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After extensive contract negotiations, the Mighty Pirates organization is extremely pleased to welcome back Howie for another season of insightful, amusing, and extremely addictive commentary! Yes, Howie tells it like it is!

You'll find links to each and every Howie Report right here after each game.

The Howie Report
2005-01-24: Mighty Pirates 7 vs. Condors 0

As anyone aficionado of PirateHockey.ca (as well as Mark Twain and Benjamin Disraeli) knows, there are lies, damn lies and statistics. Look at TNHC's statistics page on goaltenders, and you will see that Matthew Lella, goalie for the Mighty Pirates, ranks fourth among 'keeps in the Monday Night Coors Light Division, with a GAA of 2.75, well behind the Tigers' Jonathan Lampert at 2.31. But as any fan of the boys in yellow and black will tell you, the HOTTEST goalie in the Division — running away — is Matthew Lella, who has put up an astounding 0.20 GAA over his last five games. Do the math, and that tells you he has given up ONE goal in those five games, and therefore notched FOUR shutouts. Who is hotter than that? Indeed, when the final buzzer sounded the end of last Monday night's game against the Condors and the scoresheet (but not the scoreboard) recorded the 7-0 score, Matthew had already reached another 48 minutes and 31 seconds of shutout hockey, setting up another run at his own record (set the previous week) of 111 minutes and 33 seconds.

But (as usual) I am getting ahead of myself. By the time yours truly got to RINX 3, nice and early at 10:40, there were just four minutes left in the previous game. And as the ten Pirates who were there hurriedly got dressed and hustled onto the ice in time for the inevitable early drop of the puck, Dave Turner and Jim Jezioranski were just coming in the door (of course, JJ was out in plenty of time to take his first shift, notwithstanding...). Accordingly, Captain Vito Mola, faced with the missing Barrie boys (Todd Kitchen and Jim Butler) as well as an ill Shaun Leggett, went as usual with two centres (John Mutch and Nick Perri), three sets of wingers (DT and JJ, Mark Sager and Auby Mandell, and Mola and Jonathan Gallivan) and two pairs of defensemen (Richard Bingham with Rob Kwinter, and Blair Dimock with Les Klein).

The Condors, as the Pirates know all too well, are a formidable opponent. In five previous meetings, while coming out on top in every contest, the games have been tight — and getting tighter, with the last two being decided by a score of 3-2. It does not get closer than that! And aside from a group of tenacious skaters and a good team spirit, they also sport the division's top scorer (now tied with the MP's own John Mutch) in Julian van Hoof, and a tremendously agile and skilled goalie in Weeman Wong. It was no surprise that in the early going, the skating was fierce and the battles for the puck fast and furious. So, the Pirates did not exactly feel safe when as a result of a tremendous scramble in front of the Condor net just 1:17 into the game, Mandell put the puck past the goalie on a lovely feed from Mutch to take the lead. Wong handled several whacks at the puck, several astounding saves and controlled rebounds, but in the end, the Pirate pressure managed that first score. That pace continued unabated through the first, until with 2:59 left, Jezioranski and Mutch made their way down the ice on a 2 on 1, and John Mutch took JJ's feed and slipped it perfectly past the sprawling Condor netminder.

In the second period, the deeper Pirate bench — plus, of course, the team's superb conditioning, a result of the legendary Wednesday Night Pirate Skate™ — began to take its toll on the Condors. Halfway through the period, after Wong had again fended off a furious Pirate attack, John Mutch fed a pinching Vito Mola on the right slot, who rifled an unstoppable slap shot into the upper corner of the net that no one could have stopped, to make the score 3-0. Two minutes and 7 seconds later, Klein skated back deep to the Pirate end to retrieve yet another uncalled icing, and in the face of mounting Condor pressure, managed to dish the puck up to Jonathan Gallivan, who took off and beat two defensemen to the net on a breakaway and put in another goal (and giving Klein an incredibly easy assist), to end the period with a 4-0 goal.

The Pirates still were finding it hard to believe that the game would go so easily, and indeed, it took extraordinary efforts to blunt the Condor assaults. Of course, Matthew Lella was "ON" all night, but he really showed his stuff when with 1:30 to go in the period, Lella made his save of the game. After spotting an unchecked Condor on the right face-off dot, he came WAY out of the net to the bottom of the circle to challenge. The puck got to the Condor, but he had nowhere to shoot, and the great save was made.

By the time the third period started, the energy had gone out of the Condor attack. They were pretty much back on their heels, and the Pirate attack persisted. Five minutes and 25 seconds in, John Mutch and Jonathan Gallivan put on a give and go clinic and notched JM's second goal of the game. At that point, the Pirates, gentlemen that they were began to ease up on the pressure, the game seeming very much in hand. The only two scores thereafter were an unassisted goal by John Mutch, who intercepted a clearing pass at the Condor blue line with his body, and having no one between him and the goalie, could not help but put the puck away for a hat trick on the night. Similarly, Jonathan Gallivan found himself all alone in the Condor end with just 1:38 left, and almost apologetically backhanded the puck into the upper corner for another unassisted goal.

The one Pirate that was determined to get on the scoresheet was Richard Bingham. He was on a tear all night (though luckily not such a tear that it would land him in the penalty box — in fact, the game was a very clean contest, with no trips by either trip to the sin bin), and only the efforts of the Condor goalie denied him a spot with the scorers. Breakaways, tremendous slap shots, shots from the point, the slot, the hatch marks, at point blank range — all were to no avail. In the end, one of RB's team mates attributed to him the following analysis: "It was a clean game and the Condors are good guys, so I'm just gonna lie on the puck to get a Delay of Game penalty ... at least that will get me on the Game Sheet!" Heck, even that did not work!

Other stellar efforts also deserve note. The fact that van Hoof was held scoreless was due in no small measure to the fantastic shadowing work of "Jaromir" Sager on Van Hoof! As JJ commented, "Sometimes it doesn't seem like it, but the best thing you can do is cover your man." In addition, Blair Dimock was tremendous on defence — at times, it appeared that Blair thought it was HIS shutout that was on the line, not Matthew's. For instance, with under four minutes to go, Dimock made an amazing poke-check on a Condor 3-on-1, then proceeded to block another shot to take away another scoring chance!

All in all, it was a fabulous effort, and one that will carry the Pirates some way towards their goal in the last games of the regular season and the playoffs. Next up are the Crunch, who fell victim to the Pirates in December by a score of 5-3. This is also a team not to be underestimated. They are a clean team, and while they have the highest GAA in the division, they are not that far behind the pack. Furthermore, they are winless in six and HUNGRY. Be there next Monday as the Pirates take them on at 7:00 p.m. in RINX 3. It should be fun!

GO PIRATES!!! VIVA LOS PIRATAS!!!

Howie