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After extensive contract negotiations, the Mighty Pirates organization is extremely pleased to welcome back Howie for another season of insightful, amusing, and extremely addictive commentary! Yes, Howie tells it like it is!

You'll find links to each and every Howie Report right here after each game.

An Abject Apology
2010-01-11: Mighty Pirates 1 at Ice Demons 4

There is nothing that can properly express my embarrassment at the behaviour of L. Klein at last night's game. I am not sure what came over me, but the gratuitous taunting, the endless meaningless chatter and the plain poor sportsmanship was unacceptable at any level. I would not accept it from any of you, and you should not have to accept it from me. It was disrespectful to the sport of hockey, to the Ice Demons, to my own teammates, to my son and to myself. Please — if you can find it in your hearts — accept my apology and I promise to never let it happen again.

On top of all of that, my behaviour clouded what was in fact a magnificent performance by the Mighty Pirates(6-8-0) in what was by and large a very exciting and fun game to play in and watch. Why I was so blinded to this I cannot fathom...

First of all, the Pirates send out a full squad of 15 skaters and Lella in goal. The six defensemen were S. Klein, E. Mintz, Jezioranski, Bingham, L. Klein and ("playing the part of Chris Besant tonight") Kwinter. Centres were Mutch, Gallivan and Besant; right wingers were Mola, Sousa and Sturgeon; and left wingers were Turner, Mandell and Phillips. And everyone of them (with one notable exception — see above) played a great game of Pirate Brand Hockey® against a much younger, much faster, much better passing, skating and shooting team. While there was some discussion post-game whether the ICs were holding back or not, it certainly did not feel that way when we were out on the ice.

Matthew was — once again — a stalwart in protecting the honour of the Mighty Pirates. In the second period, for example, the ICs really turned on the heat, and he was peppered with shots, yet allowed only one lone goal in the middle frame. He, of course, was helped immensely be the tireless efforts of the defensive corps (not corpse), who at all costs tried to keep the Ice Demons out of any scoring lanes. In fact, the score was still just 0-1 until there were just over four minutes left in the second. This, despite extended periods when the Pirates were penned in their own end. And even when the ICs scored in the second, the MPs did not give up — this really became the theme of the evening. There was no "here we go again" attitude on the bench, nor did the Pirates waver from the strong defence-opportunistic offence approach, which still led to several magnificent scoring opportunities for your heroes.

One of the most spectacular of the night was a particular sparkplug for the Pirates. With just over two minutes left in the second, Evan Mintz went — no flew! — end-to-end, placing a perfect shot as he flew through the air to make it a 1-2 score, and making some Pirates think, "Hey, we are still in this thing!"

While an early third period goal made it 1-3, the Mighty Pirates still didn't give up: a smart pinch from Turner allowed Mutch to wheel and deal into the slot and lay a magnificent pass onto the stick of Gallivan, but his tip couldn't find its way into the net. Moments later, Gallivan slid a 2-on-1 pass to Mutch for a clean break, but the Demons goalie stood tall, saving the shot — and a juicy rebound — to retain the Satanics' two-goal lead, even though it could easily have been tied up.

But the story of the night was defence. The pace of the game was such that it is hard to remember all of the highlight reel quality plays, but certainly one of them had to be when Evan Mintz deftly scooped out a dangerous shot with the puck sitting on the goal line and Matthew sprawled at the other side of the net. Lella also took charge whenever the Demons piled on the pressure — at one point, he made three point-blank saves in a matter of 1.6 seconds! And perhaps the most mind-boggling one of all was Sturgeon's huge shot block at the blue line. His legs were stacked in true goalie form, and he showed no fear — maybe he forgot he wasn't wearing all that padding, but whatever it was, it broke up another scoring drive.

Now no Howie Report on a game against the Ice Demons (Ice Armenians?) would be complete without noting that #8 scored two more goals — congratulations to him. What possible thrill this guy could get from playing at this level is one for the psychologists among us. His second goal just 19 seconds into the third came from a missed pass interception, and Mr. "I'm So Awesome" (who now has 37 points for the season — nearly double his closest rival in the division) still had to practice his fist pump and "Whohoo!" Oh, well, some people do not ever grow up — but who am I to talk...

In any case, the general consensus was that this team is really gelling. Even in goals for and against in the last five games, the balance between offence and defence is excellent. With the exception of the ICs, this division is very competitive and the games are a lot of fun to play. Let's keep it up and see if we can play our very best in the second half. And keeping our PIMs down has helped everyone concentrate on the game rather than the refs!

Next week it is the streaking Mongolian Horde (6-7-1), now unbeaten in three games, at 6:10 pm in RINX 2. Please let Vito know if you cannot play, so that he can contact subs if required. In the meantime,

GO PIRATES!!! VIVEN LOS PIRATAS!!!

And I will see you all again on the 25th...

Howie/Les