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After extensive contract negotiations, the Mighty Pirates organization is extremely pleased to welcome back Howie for another season of insightful, amusing, and extremely addictive commentary! Yes, Howie tells it like it is!

You'll find links to each and every Howie Report right here after each game.

The Howie-Les Report (Playoff Edition, Round One)
2012-03-19: Mighty Pirates 4 at Drunken Monkeys 5

It took a mere 56 seconds for the Pirates (0-1) and Drunken Monkeys (1-0) to equal their total regulation-time goal output from last year's Monday Ellis Division Final. The Monkeys slid one in on their first shot of the game 34 seconds after the puck drop before most of the crowd of 0 were even in their seats. But, 22 seconds later, the Bucs evened the score as Gallivan spun around with a pass to Hine in the slot and he buried it. This was not going to be the defensive drudge match everyone expected.

On this night, the referees (neither of whom we've seen before) were going to let the teams go for it. They were going to let the teams decide who gets the win and who gets the loss. It led to a wide-open, free flowing, back-and-forth game that was very exciting.

With a rash of injuries to Kwinter, Leggett, L. Klein and Sager, the ineligible N. Sinclair and Tassone, and "Stuck on the Bayview Expressway" Mutch, Captain Mola was left with just two lines to start the playoffs. He ended up centring Turner and Phillips, while Gallivan was in between Mandell and Hine. J. Klein and Jezioranski paired up on defense, as did Besant and Sousa.

A nice goal from the Monkeys top goal scorer Issenman gave them a 1-2 lead just as the first period was coming to close. But, the Pirates had plenty of opportunities this night, despite the small bench. Just under three minutes into the second frame, Mandell grabbed the puck deep in the corner and powered his way to the net. After two shots, the puck squirted to the slot where J. Klein snuck in from the blueline. His shot was unstoppable, and we were tied again!

The tenacious Drunken Monkeys kept skating hard, and they found their third lead of the game halfway through the middle period. At this point, you could see the Pirates starting to lose a little steam. But, like a glowing angel hopping cloud to cloud, the team could see Mutch bounding down the Rinx 3 hall! As he joined his teammates on the bench, however, the Monkeys took a two-goal lead with a mere 11 seconds left in the second period. Did that get them down? Heck no! This is the playoffs!

Now going with three left wingers, having Mutch skating up and down centre gave the Bucs new life. Everyone's forechecking intensified, and the team's defensive coverage got better — believe it, or not!

And, the Pirates were rewarded a few minutes into the third as Mutch scored on a breakway to cut the lead in half... a one goal game! A couple minutes later, and the game was tied... another goal for Mutch as he and Hine banged around in front of the net.

The chances didn't end there, either. The Pirates held on to the balance of play for some time after tying it. Gallivan had a chance to give the Pirates the lead, but a smart defensive play from the Monkeys thwarted the opportunity. Then he, Hine and Mandell had a goal mouth scramble for what seemed like an eternity, but the puck was finally covered. Too many chances to even remember.

But, in the final moment, the cloest chance to win came from the Monkeys as a low, hard shot found it's way through Sturgeon... but, it glazed off the post. We were headed to overtime.

And, the chances wouldn't end here either. Back and forth action ensued, but neither team could end the game. Shades of last year's Final saw the Drunken Monkeys take two offensive zone faceoffs in the dying seconds of overtime, but this time your heroes held the tailed primates to no shots.

They say a shootout usually favours the shooters. But, on this night, each of the first five shooters from each team failed to beat the goalies. Monkey goalie Manett showed why he finished the regular season with the best GAA in the entire division, standing tall and thwarting all the Pirate dekes. Though, on the other side of the rink, Sturgeon was equal to the task, not giving the Monkeys anywhere to shoot... not budging on any fake. In the end, it was the sixth Monkey shooter that squeezed one by while the Bucs failed to score.

As close as the game was, a loss is a loss, and the Pirates have extended their club-record losing streak to 12 games. The loss also puts them in the dreaded position of having to win the next three games they play if they want to claim the True North Cup. Every game from now on is do-or-die!